Tiny Penis, Big Vagina

Published May 11, 2015 by WELCOME TO HEIDI

I once dated a guy who told me I had a big vagina. Now I know what you’re thinking – “what a horrible lie to tell” – and you’re right – we didn’t date – we had an affair – that lasted about four days – but to me it felt like dating – and his words about my vagina – were crushing.
Boys love to talk about the size of their penis’s – or penises – or peni – or whatever the plural of dick is. They will tell you they have a tiny dick in a hot second. Usually they are doing this so that you are shockingly surprised when you get in bed with them and its normal. You were expecting a toothpick to pierce your little dolphin (Look at the vagina sideways and it looks just like Flipper) so when it turned out to be average – you were thrilled. The truth of the matter is – girls don’t really give a shit. Size doesn’t really matter. Until you tell us we have a flesh cave between our legs that you can hear your dick echo in when it calls your name. Then we care – then we shall prove that you have an unsatisfying one inch killer between your legs and we shall tell the world about it – one day – when we know you aren’t paying attention. But a big vagina is not something women discuss – so as far as I know – I’m the only girl that’s ever been told this. If there are others, please email me privately, but don’t’ send me any Vag pics – I don’t even want to look at mine so looking at yours is at the top of my “no thank you not today” list.
Here’s what I know about my vagina. It’s normal. In fact – it’s probably pretty tiny – because I am pretty tiny – and I haven’t dated any porn stars with fourteen inch meat thermometers– that I know of. But the guy I dated (just let me call it that, it’s my story) the one who said I had a big vagina – definitely had a micro dick. When we had sex it felt like he was hurling a pea down a bowling alley – or throwing a hot dog down a hallway – or one hundred other expressions men have come up with for having a big vagina. He told me in the middle of having sex – while his guppy of a dick was swishing around in my perfectly normal vagina tank looking for a nice rock – or one of those little houses – or a piece of coral to land on. Forgive the fish analogy but I’m not using to discuss the smell – that is one expression that really pisses me off. Women smell great. If they bathe. The end. So, stupid me, I believed him when he said I had a giant vagina. And I became very self conscious of said vagina. Is there something you can do to shrink the vagina? Of course there is. I think the second men figured out how to make boobs bigger they went to work on how to make vagina’s smaller. But guess what – fuck you. My vagina is normal and he was a big fat liar. Well everywhere except the pants. There was nothing big and fat there. It took a while for me to realize that my vagina was normal. Actually it took as long as it took for me to have sex with someone other than this baby carrot carrier. So about a day. I’ve moved on. I’ve healed. And I hope other women out there know – if a guy tells you you have a giant vagina – do the one thing you can – get another guy. I did. The vagina liar happens to be a super famous actor so every time I see him on screen I die a little bit inside but he keeps getting fatter which means his dick keeps looking smaller so I guess there is justice in the world so thank you for that God or Jesus or Mother Nature or Aliens or whomevers in charge of making sure people who have wronged me have terrible things happen to them. PS – there is such a thing as a loose vagina and I’m super sorry if this has happened to you. But if it has – make sure you tell your partner that it’s him and not you. They’ve been doing it to us for years. It’s penis payback time. Me and my dolphin support you.

20 comments on “Tiny Penis, Big Vagina

  • Fair warning, my brothers. Any guy who would presume to comment on this (including me) is borderline suicidal. I’m taking one for the team to warn you, “Danger, danger, Will Robinson. Put your hands in your pockets and let the impulse die.”

    • I add the additional note that I have known with clarity since age six that my penis is unusually small (medically classifiable as micropenis), and I’ve never once tried to blame a woman for a lack of genital compatibility or told anyone that she had a large vagina. I’m sorry that this man in your past blamed his physical inadequacy on you and that he never learned to make up for it with spirited effort focused on your pleasure and being exceptionally pleasing in other ways. It’s something that us guys with small penises ought to learn by age 17, but some never really do.

  • I love women with big and juicy vaginas !

    My girlfriend is a 48yo MILF with a big vagina, she jumps on top of me without waiting for my erection, manages to stick my not erected penis inside her big love hole, and then her vagina warmth and juices work better that a box of Viagra.
    With her big vagina she is able to force me to have sex !!!

    My penis is too small to touch her cervix, but it have the correct dimensions to touch her G-spot that makes her come really fast.

    Before her, I had a tight vagina girlfriend (not a MILF) more sexy than my current girlfriend, but her pussy was too tight and I was felling when she was too dry and that is a great turn-off for me !

    There is nothing better than having sex with a large sloppy vagina!!!

    If I need a tight thing encircling my penis …. I just use a hand !!!

  • My situation sounds similar. I never had an issue with sex until I met this guy. Makes me question my vagina size. He did have the smallest penis I’ve seen so maybe that’s it? It just feels like he was poking me but I couldn’t feel it. I was super wet.. maybe that’s it?

  • Well yeah some girls don’t realize it / or do but don’t care/on purpose that telling a man he his small and laughing about is the best way to destroy him. That’s unfortunatly what happened to me when i was 16 my first ”sex” experience.

    I’m 183cm tall and my penis is around 5.1 inches and a lil bit thin at that time i thought i was average but because of the shape of my body and size it looks maybe smaller too

    Had this crush on the girl everything was fine until we started to take off the clothes she was 18 at the time… when she saw my thing she started laughing and immediatly started putting her clothes back.I said :
    – is there something wrong? (i already had a hint about the why but still tried to convince myself that she wasn’t doing that).

    She said while still making small laugh noises:
    -do you really espect to have sex with me with that small thing.

    I was out of words my life and world just destroyed in 10 minutes.
    The next day at school i was being calling names… attempted to kill myself several times in my last school years.

    Now i’m 21 still a virgin a will probably be for life, and now when a girl is near me i’m Afraid & Shy can’t start a conversation neither look at her eyes. still have some suicidals thoughts sometimes but stopped attempting it, i can’t keep stopping thinking that womens will never like my size. humiliate me for it or that i will never able to truly satisfy her, .

    Saying or making fun of someone else genitals can really be destructive… Please girls/mans try to be nicer to poeple with small penis or big vaginas im not saying you should accept it but at least be nice and don’t spread the word around because some humans are cruel and will be happy by making you sad.

    Sorry for my bad english. have a nice day

    • thats a terrible story and i’m sorry for you but i bet there is a vagina for every penis. size really doesn’t matter. love does. i write things for comedy effect but i know how hard women are on penis size. you know what else tops a small penis? being a really amazing human being. : )
      dont kill yourself over something like this. that would be crazy. life is beautiful in so many ways and sex is just a thing people become obsessed over. it’s not the BE ALL END ALL and you can have the worlds greatest life without ever having sex! focus your energy somewhere else and i bet you will conquer the world.

    • Just be up front about it when you finally like someone and tell them – hey i have a small dick so if that’s a problem – move on. good people don’t give a shit. it’s a penis… not a brain. now if you have a small brain you’re in deep trouble. hahahaha.

    • No one can be destroyed by being laughed at or criticized, without your participation and consent. You likely missed the point of the posting: Heidi didn’t allow herself to be destroyed by a comment.

      Remember, it’s not what they call you that counts. It’s what you answer to, and Hidman, you’re answering to the wrong thing.

      Many a man has had very successful relationships and an interesting and exciting sex life with half of what you have down there. I know, because I am one such man.

  • Have you considered this, Maybe, just maybe… You do have an abnormally large vagina. You simply refuse to except what you choose to take as negative criticism. Hmmmmm!

  • Well dear I guess I could go two ways with this one I love a big sloppy pussy something about it that just makes me rock hard maybe I’m sick I don’t know but number 2 I can understand stand were you are comeing from but don’t be mad feed in to it and see how he acts just like when he says bring your big pussy over hear look at him pull your pussy apart wide as you can get it just hold it there it blow his

  • I’m a 52 year old guy and I have an average size penis. My wife is 61 years old and she really does have a loose vagina but I love it to bits and I have no problem making her cum everytime. I absolutely love a loose sloppy vagina anytime, I just love the way my penis drowns inside when it’s soaking wet until I can’t feel anything. I absolutely love and worship a pussy like that.

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